Anonymous said: My boyfriend and I recently broke up and we were talking about it. He got into drugs again and asked me if we ever got back together if he would need to stop smoking weed, I being completely against drugs. I thought about it and said no, not if we were doing long distance but if we're together, yes. He said he'd stop for me anyway but were not getting back together. Why would he ask then? :(
Honestly, I don’t know why he would ask you that if he wanted to break up regardless, but I think the main thing is that you’re against drugs and he got back into them; and I think it would be really stressful for you if you were to be in a relationship with him, knowing he’s doing something you really don’t approve of.
I still don’t really know why he would ask you that, but since he said he would stop doing them for you, there’s always a chance he’ll want to come back to you in the future. At least you know that that option is still open, you know?
Anonymous said: 2/2 to have him here. I tell him all the time, and he's working on getting a job to come visit me; he's really trying. So i don't want to annoy him by constantly saying "I want you here." No one has ever made me as happy and loved as i am, but at the same time it's the hardest thing i've ever been through. Do you have any advice?
I never got part 1/2! :( I’m guessing you just really miss your bf and don’t want to seem to clingy by telling him you want him to visit you all the time…
My advice would be to just keep reminding yourself that even though you’re not together now, in the near future, you’ll be able to wake up next to him and send a lifetime with him. Just keep telling yourself that all the pain and missing and hardships you go through will be worth it in the end. And remember to stay strong! :)
Anonymous said: hello! i am in a LDR myself and i recently found your blog a few weeks ago and i think its very helpful for those in a LDR. i just wanted you to say dont give up. i know you guys are on a break and you seem like a very strong woman but sometimes we all need to hear the words dont give up. if you love someone, sometimes you must set them free to figure out if they're really yours or not. and also remember long distance is a bear but when you embrace a bear you can receive a mighty hug. :)
hey :) thanks for the positive words. I’m definitely trying to keep them in mind while I wait for him to sort his own things out.
thank you again :)
Anonymous said: hey so i'm going to see my ldr tomorrow for the first time in like 2 months. and to be honest i don't really like his family,nothing personal or anything but they didn't let me see him on our year and a half.
hey, don’t worry about it. if you want to marry your bf (which I assume you do) you’re gonna have to get used to them. Or at least learn how to put up with them lol
my mom doesn’t like my ldb and she doesn’t even know we’re dating! we just suck it up and enjoy each other’s company. don’t let his family get to you. you’re going to get to see your boyfriend, so just stay excited about that! :)
Anonymous said: Some days are better than others. How do you get past the bad days? I'm having a horrible day and even accused my boyfriend of not making any effort to be here although I know he has been.
Imagine your life without him. I know I’m being a total downer right now, but if you’re having a shitty day and you’re taking it out on him ( not judging, I do it all the time), then think about what life would be like if you didn’t have him to rant to, talk to, and be with. I know I’m a total bitch to my bf sometimes, and only recently when my bf told me he was fed up and needed a break did I realize I shouldn’t have been treating him that way, that I got too comfortable with him always being there. Now I’m going to have to wait for him to come back to me, if he wants…and it’s a terrifying thing to think about.
So to get past your bad days, remember how lucky you are to have your bf, and suck it up and apologize and remind him you love him with all your heart (it doesn’t have to be today, take some time to cool off first haha)
Hope it helps!
Anonymous said: I know this probably is weird but how do you do skypesex?
come off anon and I’ll enlighten you lol
Anonymous said: I've been dating this guy for a couple months now. I remember early on I asked him if he ever watched porn. He said he's seen some but he doesn't like watching them and actually getting off on them. He says it's weird for him watching other people have sex. I know it seems odd but i kind of wanted him to say he did. He's the first bf that i've had that doesnt actually look at porn. Im afraid with the distance he'll find satisfaction somewhere else. I make him my own videos but I hope i'm enough?
My bf doesn’t watch porn either, mostly because we have skype sex and we have videos of us from the times when he’s visited.
Honestly, if he doesn’t like looking at it and says it weird, then I really don’t think you should be worried about it. You should try out skype sex if you’re worried he’ll try to find satisfaction somewhere else, it’s the closest you can get to the real thing and I’m sure he’d love to get off to you instead of some random couple. You’re definitely enough. Otherwise he just wouldn’t be with you…you’re worth the distance and everything that comes along with it <3
yeahghost-deactivated20140619 said: I think you should open up submissions so that other people can share their stories about their LDRs. It has the possibility to be totally uplifting. :)
ever since I changed my theme I’ve been trying to figure out how to get the link to show. technically it should be open because I never went and “closed” it. if you could show me how that’d be awesome. I might just find another theme though….
teapotyoga said: Hey, I just saw that you've gone on a break with your boyfriend so wanted to lend a few words of support. I think it's really great you're taking control of your problems and being proactive, I took the same steps a few months ago and the feeling of reclaiming yourself is very healthy :) I do hope that your boyfriend realises that your issues weren't something you created on your own and that he had a part to play and supports you (although obviously don't blame him lol.) You're on track lass!
thank you <3 that really helps to hear. And yeah, I never realized it before, but because of this break (even though I’m hating every second of it) I feel like I’m my own person again…I didn’t realize that I made my bf my life, and that everything I was doing was around his schedule. I finally feel like myself. It’s weird but also very comforting in a way. I just hope he wants to stay with me, whenever he decides to talk to me again.
Thank you for the support! <3
kiss-ingniall said: Me and my long distance boyfriend for over a year and a half broke up with me almost a month ago because I was jealous and over reacted to everything. Breaking up made me change for the better and I want him back but he's being stubborn. He doesn't think i'll make him happy again. What do i do to get him back?
Hey girl…honestly, I’m pretty much in the same position you are, except that my bf wanted a break but I have no idea if/when he wants to get back together so I’m just as torn apart as you are. Mine also needed a break because he was exhausted from my jealousy problems and overreacting to everything he did. I wish I knew earlier how to control it.
I’m going to counseling now to help improve myself, and when he wants to talk to me again I’m definitely going to let him know that so he knows I’m being proactive and being serious about getting better and over my issues. Maybe you could tell your ex that, and show that you’ve been trying so hard to make it work again… remind him that you’ve been together for over a year and a half (same situation as me, crazy!) and that what both of you have is so special and unique because it’s long distance and that it’d be a waste to throw it away, espeically since you’re getting help for yourself now.
Hope that helped…that’s what I’m doing…so let me know how it goes :/
my-steady-flame-deactivated2012 said: 2/2 about. So i politely declined his offer. I didn't want him to think that i feel the same way about him that he did for me. That night, he asked me if i had a boyfriend (for some reason, he just wanted to make sure). And when i told him i did, he just thanked me fir being honest with him. I was glad he reacted that way. It made me respect him as a guy who wouldn't steal someone else's girlfiend. I guess keeping an arm's length from him helped me not to do something i'd regret forever.